I used to want to DO and BE EVERYTHING for EVERYONE - I worked hard at my jobs and approached them like they were my own business. I gave as much of myself to many people in as many ways as I could to help them... It helped me grow and learn and care DEEPLY, but it also led to being taken advantage of, underappreciated, undervalued and overworked - and usually underpaid.
My giving my ALL to everyone else and filling my days with passion projects to help others meant I rarely had time for myself anymore... no gardening, no drawing, no baking and often feeling guilty when I did take a breather to read a book or watch a movie.
I am learning now that we sometimes have to be what we are NOT so we that know who we ARE and who we want to BE - this gives us the determination and drive to create positive change in our lives - to find innovative solutions to the work/life balance. I learned that I don't have to be EVERYTHING for EVERYONE but that I needed to be that for ME - so I started putting up healthy boundaries, valuing my time, respecting myself and caring for my Self - which in turn means I am able to even MORE in the long run for my Self and others - but in a healthy way.
This does mean some changes coming up to how I do business and what projects I will be continuing and which ones will be coming to a hold or end - but I am finally ok with that...
I am still a work in progress (as we all are), but I now notice when I am taking on too much - I breathe in the awareness of overwhelm and seek out ways to reduce this... and every time I push myself too far - give of my Self too much - forget to take care of my Self - I step back, meditate and reconnect to my Self, write some lists and take a breather.
How I reconnect with my Self when life is overwhelming me:
- Meditate (I find it takes around 7 minutes to quiet my mind followed by a bliss state)
- Sleep (I allow my Self to dream, rejuvenate and refresh)
- Pray (All day every day I pray and thank God)
- Garden (Usually barefoot, letting the mud squish between my toes)
- Create Art (As a 'masterpiec'e or as a doodle/scribble it doesn't matter)
- Read (Uplifting, informational and inspiring fiction or non-fiction depending on the mood)
- Watch (Uplifting and Inspiring movies and documentaries on Netflix, Youtube and Gaia TV)
- Listen (to uplifting music from my Spotify and Youtube playlists or CDs)
- Escape (I leave the house, whether to drive or wander around... a change of scenery)
- Nature (Spend time in nature at home or in our amazing scenic countryside)
- Bake (I love making banana pikelets, 'healthy' doughnuts and cookies)
- Visit (While I was sick I didn't venture out much, but now I LOVE visiting friends, especially my neighbour Clare across the road - I don't need to go far to see her beautiful face! - If I can't visit, I will call my mum)
... However ... when the work, job, (parenting), housework still has to be done and I am tired ... I strip it all back to the basic foundations and rebuild it with a checklist of things that need doing in priority order and just work my way through at my own pace (and take regular fresh air, muddy feet, sunshine breaks).
This blog post is not necessarily for you - however I hope it can give you guidance and awareness - it is more for me to constantly remind myself that life is FUN and MAGICAL and when it doesn't feel like that, it is time to reconnect with God the Father, Mother Nature and my Self.
Always a work in progress, but getting better at connecting with my Self every day.
Thank you for reading. Amanda Sears
**When you have nothing left to give and your bucket is empty, give love and compassion - it is always in abundance for you and for every one**